My thoughts about marriage and couples

Ok....guys...I have finally had some time to share.
First off, this is a combination of ideas that others have shared with me, and my observations that I feel are important in a healthy marriage/relationship.
Coming from a unhealthy background(I don't know else to word this besides hurting people's feelings when reading this), BUT...my wisdom has taught me...
I'll start with marriage first.

SEX---Yes, I'm starting with this subject first just to get it out of the way. But, I feel sex was created to be in the confines of a marriage. And, when mankind are destructive with it and abuse the power of sex, they are hurting themselves in different ways. Emotionally, being one of those. Don't get me wrong, but sex is fun, exciting, and pleasure-ful(is that even a word), hence, the Master's intention. I just don't know how many times because of this one beautiful thing that was meant to be created for committed(yes, in marriage) adults it can cause so much hurt and damage to an individual. It's really sad when I see girls sleep around based on their own insecurities. Vice versa for men as well. If you do come to that place in the relationship that sex has entered in, communication between each other becomes so confusing, ESPECIALLY if you cannot even conquer how to communicate with each other well.

COMMUNICATION---OMG, people. This really should be first on my post...but yeah....it is so frustrating when i see people come to the point where they start name-calling each other in front of others...#1 that tells me you don't know how to communicate, and you don't know how to care for each other well. "Sticks and stone may break my bones, and words can't hurt me" come to mind, but i have to say to that is BULLShiz. Words are so powerful, they can build you up or break you down. I think after so many years of being broken down verbally, one can become immune. It's a little different when you enter into a relationship(with anyone friend or intimate lover), words are the key to building intimacy, resolving conflict[insert other examples here]. For sure, start focusing on how you can build people up. People need to feel encouraged, and that you basically have hope in them(even if they fail you once in a while). And, honey don't expect a white knight...those are only found in Twilight movies. Ain't no Edward or Jacob in real life. *broken glass just shattered* LEARN how you communicate. It could be directly or indirectly, and take it from there.

LOVE LANGUAGES...i'll be sure to include book plugs. But in the meantime, I have really loved how there is a way each one of us knows how to care for each other. There is 5, according to Gary Chapman. Personal touch, gifts, acts of service, quality time, and words of affirmation. Figure out how you like to care for people, and you know what that is how you probably expect to be cared for back. Make space to learn how to care for each other because you each might have different ways to care for on another.

I think I have what I can share now or just what's @ the top of my head. This is more of a work in progress...possibly more to come in a few months.